Tuesday, April 3, 2012

The Raw Review 4/2/2012

WWE Monday Night RAW 4/2/2012
The American Airlines Arena  Miami, FL

1. Big Johnny's State of the WWE address to start the show. He talks about how he is now the sole GM in WWE and tonight is about "People Power" whatever that means. He then makes a US Title match for tonight with Santino defending against Ziggler and Swagger. CM Punk then speaks up as he walks through the crowded locker room. He calls Big Johnny a 'Toolbox" and earns himself a title defense against Mark Henry for his trouble

Punk and Henry were both supposed to be in a 10 man tag match tonight. Guess that isn't happening. Gotta love it when McMahon changes shit up at the last minute. It must be so much fun to work for WWE Creative. (oozing with sarcasm)

2. The Rock comes out for his victory speech. He praises John Cena for giving him a great match last night, and the 'People' for welcoming him home. He goes on to say that he is not done, and Wrestlemania was just the beginning.

I will go on record and say that I enjoyed their match way more than I expected I would. A lot of people have said that it didn't live up to the hype, but how could it? They promoted it for a year straight, almost entirely through boasting and shit talking. It had been built up way larger than either man could deliver. But what it turned out to be was a decent edge of your seat battle. My house had a living room full of people cheering the entire time, and that included some non-wrestling fans.

3. United States Title: Santino© vs Dolph Ziggler vs Jack Swagger

Ziggler and Swagger spend most of the match working together to beatdown Santino. Ziggler goes for a pin and gets broken up by Swagger. They argue and Swagger nails Ziggler with a belly to belly suplex. Santino is able to recover, and hits Swagger with the cobra to end the match.

Winner by pinfall and STILL US Champ: Santino

Post match, Swagger and Ziggler chase Santino up the ramp, but they get stopped by The Funkasaurus. Ziggler charges in and takes a headbutt that lays him out. Afterwards Brodus and his hos dance with Santino.

Those two together are MONEY!!!!

4. Lord Tensai vs Alex Riley

The former Prince Albert/A-Train was dominant in this total squash. Tensai got a nice "welcome back" chant before the match. Tesnai hits the "Baldo Bomb" and the referee stops the match due to Riley's condition.

Winner by stoppage: Lord Tensai

After the match Riley gets caught in an Iron claw just in case nobody realized that he was now a total jobber.

5. WWE Championship: CM Punk© vs Mark Henry

Henry spends the early part of the match targeting Punk's injured back and toying with the champion. Punk gets caught in a Bear Hug, but is able to turn it into a DDT. Punk then recovers and hits several punches and kicks, striking at Henry. Mizark kept making comebacks everytime Punk gets any kind of momentum going. In the end, Henry dumps Punk out of the ring and he is unable to get back in before the ref counts him out..

Winner by Countout: Mark Henry

After the match Henry hits Punk with the World's Strongest Slam on the outside. Big Johnny and David Otunga come out on the stage, The GM says that he is going to make sure Punk always has lots of competion like he did tonight and his future is bleak. After Johnny and his boy toy leave, out comes Jericho through the crowd. He says that its time for Punk to celebrate his win last night...with a drink. Jericho grabs a bottle of Jack Daniels from ringside and dumps it down Punk's throat and covers him in whiskey. Jericho kicks Punk in the head, and slips on his ass in the process. He gets up and grabs another bottIe of Jack. This time he crouches over Punk and smashes the bottle over his head!! Y2J leaves as the trainers check on the WWE Champ who is out cold.

Punk took a hell of a beating tonight. I do gotta say that I am happy that the feud with Jericho will continue on for at least another month. Looks like Extreme Rules is their next stop.

6. Sheamus comes out to celebrate his World Title victory last night. Before he can say much, out comes a returning Alberto Del Rio. Del Rio says that in honor of his return, Big Johnny has given him a World Title shot on Smackdown this week. Del Rio gets too cocky and eats a Brogue Kick.

Backstage Daniel Bryan is shown watching all of this unfold on a monitor. He is asked how he feels about everything that has happend. Bryan says nothing.

I hate how they took the title off of him, but I am glad that he appears to still be in the title hunt.

7. Cody Rhodes vs Kofi Kingston

Short match. Cody nails Kofi with the Disaster Kick. Before Rhodes can get the win, out comes The Big Show who shows Cody photos of him getting KO'd last night. A flustered Rhodes turns right into Trouble in Paradise to end the match.

Winner by Pinfall: Kofi Kingston

8. Mark Henry is shown throwing shit around backstage. Out of nowhere arrives Abraham Washington who gives him his card.

I guess Henry now has a mouthpiece. But god do I hate Abraham.

9. Eve comes out and gloats about how dumb and easy manipulate Zack Ryder is.

Well, he sure didn't help his case much the last few months did he? I just want this stupid storyline to end.

10. Zack Ryder vs The Miz

Fast paced match that made both look good, which they have needed lately. In the end Miz hits The Skull Crushing Finale for the win.

Winner by Pinfall: The Miz

11. John Cena comes out to talk about his loss last night.

Cena is without his trademark happy-go-lucky grin, In its place is a look of total dissappointment. He says that the Rock beat him and he will be a gracious loser. He goes on about how he talked a big game for the last year because he truely felt that he would not lose. He says that he will not lash out on the fans or his opponents, that is not his way. (DAMN!!!) He apologizes for letting everyone down. He promises to continue doing the best that he can. Cena asks the Rock to come to the ring so he can show him the respect that he earned last night.


Brock Lesnar poses on the stage as the fans freak the fuck out!! Lesnar gets in the ring and extends his hand to Cena. Cena accepts the sign of respect and gets hit with the F5!!!


I Would've still gone with a Cena heel turn, but this has potential. I liked the short program that these two had in 2003, and now that they are on a different level, this one could be great.

Flashback to Brock Lesnar vs John Cena 2k3:

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