Tuesday, July 17, 2012

The Raw Review 7/16/2012

WWE Monday Night RAW 7/16/2012
The Mandalay Bay Events Center  Las Vegas, NV

CM Punk opens the show after retaining the Title last night, and Big Show crashes his moment.

Punk mentions that last year in this very city was when he dropped his Pipe bomb, and began the Year of Punk. He's even wearing the very same tights he did on that night. Punk is great at the little things. Last night he was wearing the same tights he wore when he won the WWE Title at last year's Money in the Bank Pay Per View.

Memory lane...

Punk and Show jaw at each other, which does a great job of building up tonight's Main Event between the two.

WWE Tag Team Titles: Trouble in Little Jimmy's Paradise© vs The Primetime Players

This match was OK. But I just cant get behind The Primetime Players because they suck, and AW only serves to annoy the shit out of me. At least they're getting behind using managers again, so that's good.

Finish: Trouble in Paradise followed by Truth dropping Young on his face for the win.

Winners: Trouble in Little Jimmy's Paradise©

Alberto Del Rio vs Zack Ryder

Short match that really served no purpose. Sounds a lot like last week's show, huh?

Finish: Cross Arm Breaker forces Ryder to tap out.

Winner: Alberto Del Rio

Post Match: We get the return of Rey Mysterio, who wastes no time charging the ring and taking out the man who put him out, Alberto Del Rio.

I haven't been the biggest Mysterio fan over the last several years, but they have a chance to put on a great match, probably at Summerslam.

Heath Slater vs Rikishi

Are you Serious, Bro?

Finish: Banzai Drop puts out The One Man Band.

Winner: Rikishi

Post Match: The lights go out...When they return Rikishi is standing in the ring with his Sons, The Usos. They then break out in Too Cool's old dance routine.

Not a bad touch. I was never a fan of the dancing back in the day, but I'll let this one go for old time sake. The only thing that would've made it better would have been if Tensai joined them and reprised his "Hip Hop Hipo" character. Just watch the video below if you missed that gem.

The Miz & Eve vs Daniel Bryan & AJ

My buddy Bret had a great idea for a renewed feud between Bryan & Miz. I can see it already.



This was the best match yet in my book. Shorter than I usually like, but something can be said about a match filled with that many unique personalities, and that's just AJ.

Finish: Eve with a Small Package on AJ, followed by Bryan reversing it to help AJ get the win for the team.

Winners: Daniel Bryan & AJ

Post Match: Daniel Bryan proposes marriage to AJ...again. But according to Bryan this one is for realzies.

This better lead to the debut of Dean Ambrose, who crashes the wedding and attacks Bryan. Daniel Bryan is much closer to being a face than a heel at this point, and they cant silence "The WWE Universe" forever. At some point they have to turn him, and who better to make it official than Ambrose? And if you are reading this and have no Idea who Dean Ambrose is, click the link below and educate yourself.

This promo was shot when Ambrose (The former Jon Moxley) was in Dragon Gate USA and was gunning for Daniel Bryan (Bryan Danielson). Could we be seeing this Indy feud spring forth to the "Big Time"? I fucking hope so.

Ryback vs Jack Swagger

Swagger attacks before the match becomes official.

Remember when Swagger was World Heavyweight Champion? Me neither...

This match was pretty impressive only because it's the most offense anyone has gotten on Ryback thus far. To bad it wasn't a match and doesn't count.

In the end Ryback stands tall begging for food.

Winner: No Contest

Dolph Ziggler Promo time.

They actually gave Ziggler some time on the mic for once. He's great at talking when given a shot. I mean have you seen his You Tube show?


Chris Jericho comes to the ring. Dolph Ziggler then proceeds to trash him to his face for several minutes with Y2J not saying a word. After about the 999th insult, Jericho nails Ziggles with the Codebreaker.

This has money written all over it. And Jericho has done nothing but put people over since he returned earlier this year, so I'm hoping that the trend will continue. It's about time that someone put over Dolph for a change. I will be watching this one closely, And if I don't get my way...Well, Fuck You WWE!!!

Brodus Clay vs JTG

JTG? HAHAHAHAHA!!! Fuck this guy!!

I'm still a Funkasaurus fan, but I've lost all faith that WWE will do anything meaningful with him. They had a guy that was very marketable, and for some reason they took him off of TV, and when he returned it was simply too late to capitalize. And a few weeks ago they had him lose his first match to the Big Show. Clay is beyond damaged goods at this point. He is basically sent out to win and dance with kids. So I ask, what's the point?

Finish: Big Splash for the victory.

Winner: Brodus Clay

Non-Title Match: CM Punk vs The Big Show

I believe this is the first match between the two since 2010 when Show was feuding with The Straight Edge Society. The only thing I really remember about that was Show taking off Punk's mask and revealing his bald head for the first time. And Big Show winning the feud at Summerslam that year by beating Punk, Gallows, and Mercury in a Handicapped Match.

I've said it before, there is nobody better at these David vs Goliath matches than Punk. His size gives him so much sympanthy, and he knows how to sell for these guys. I still think Punk vs Lesnar would be awesome.

I loved this match, Punk took a beating, but kept finding ways to rattle The Big Stinky Giant.

Finish: Show refused to stop beating on Punk, and when the ref tried to stop him, Show tossed the Zebra aside to cause a DQ.

Winner: CM Punk

Post Match: Show continues to beat on Punk which brings out the big green boy scout who has his Money in the Bank briefcase in hand. Show begs off and tells Cena to cash in on the fallen WWE Champion. Instead Cena takes the mic and says that next week on Raw 1000 he will turn over his Briefcase for a shot against Punk in the main event of the biggest Raw ever.

Show then mocks Cena for not taking his opportunity to cash in on a beaten Punk, which causes Cena to nail The Big Show with the briefcase and knock him off the apron to close the last two hour episode of Raw.

Final Verdict: A much better show than we had last week, and I am legitimately excited for next week's show. We are in store for a ton of surprises, lots of awesome Superstars from the past, and a WWE Title main event that so happens to be a rematch of one of the best matches of 2011. What could go wrong?

Oh, yeah...Everything.

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